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How to Want What You Have: Discovering the Magic and Grandeur of Ordinary Existence

Timothy Miller · 2 HN comments
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Amazon Summary
Convincing readers that wanting what they have is the secret of happiness, the author offers a simple, practical, and credible method to achieving this end by applying principles of Compassion, Attention, and Gratitude to everyday living. 20,000 first printing. $15,000 ad/promo.
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All the comments and stories posted to Hacker News that reference this book.
Mar 13, 2014 · chrisweekly on What Dreams May Come
In re: spiritual support, may I recommend "How to Want What You Have" http://www.amazon.com/How-Want-What-You-Have/dp/0805033173 which taught me to live in the moment when I was faced with my own seeming impending demise.

[I'm 39, have daughters aged 5 and 7, and had a fist-sized brain tumor removed just over a year ago. So, though I'm doing fine right now (next MRI is tomorrow morning, hoping for another clean scan), I can certainly relate.]

If you have the strength, try to take up running. My world-class oncologist (at MGH in Boston) said he wished all of his patients were runners. Not occasional joggers, but real runners as in 3 to 5 miles multiple times per week.

Also avoiding refined sugars and red meat can't possibly hurt and there's a lot of evidence that it can make a huge difference.

More generally, I urge you to fight to stay alive. Anything is possible if you just hang on and keep alive. The pace of innovation and understanding in medical science is accelerating, and “incurable” diseases have been eradicated. HIV was once a death sentence; now patients live about as long as never-infected people. Just keep breathing, and hang on. Positive change is coming.

Sending all my positive vibes and loving best wishes your way. I know you're inundated with messages from strangers but if you read this and want to talk or I can do anything for you, please do reach out. I'm "cweekly" on twitter and gmail.

Love, Chris

PS This excerpt from Alan Watts -- "Think of Nothing" -- also helped me cope, when I thought my end was near. If you're a devout Christian you might find it offensive, but I (a humanist with zen buddhist leanings) found it comforting. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQ5upMz0_ig&index=35&list=FLf...

darthclue
I wish I had the strength. As it is, I'm so weak that I can't even get upstairs to my own bed anymore. This is one of the most difficult things that I've had to accept is physical limitations. I've always been able to do physically challenging things that included running, although I'm horrible at it, and moving furniture around when needed. Now? I can barely lift my laptop and we won't even talk about the need to use an electric cart at the store now. It makes me feel weak and feeble despite mentally knowing I'm too young to be this damn old.

And I intend to fight until I have nothing left. I refuse to just give up and die. It's not in my nature.

A book that may capture and elaborate on the above (esp. re: modesty) is "How to Want What You Have" by Timothy Miller:

http://www.amazon.com/How-Want-What-You-Have/dp/0805033173

The typical "western" approach to happiness is: "I have X but I want Y, therefore, to be happy I need to achieve Y." This book reverses the equation: "I have X but want Y, therefore, to be happy I need to learn to want X." That idea may sound radically counterintuitive on first hearing, but it's reflected in many of the world's spiritual traditions.

What's especially great about it is that it approaches the subject from a rational, scientific viewpoint, so if you find yourself turned off by the spiritual side of buddhism or whatnot, the book will be welcome.

Also, music is a good call generally - the ability to play an instrument will repay itself many times over a lifetime.

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